Perfectionism

Time to wrap up the series that I started a couple of months ago on the three P's. Procrastination, Prioritising and today's blog on Perfectionism. I see so many variations of these three with my clients that I really wanted to get it down on paper to share with you.

Unfortunately I've seen and experienced firsthand how perfectionism can wreak havoc on both our physical and mental well-being. I still see so much glorification on these so-called flawless achievements of individuals and the seemingly 'easy' road to get there. When in reality the pressure to be perfect and be that person to everyone is if fact overwhelming. In my own experience and now through the journey of coaching I've seen the benefits of embracing the imperfection, bringing greater fulfillment and a real sense of peace.

My thoughts from the journey and the various deep dives I've done...........

Perfectionism, at its core, is a double-edged sword (sharp on both sides). On one hand, it can be a driving force for excellence, pushing us to strive for our best and achieve great things. On the other hand, it can be a relentless taskmaster, never satisfied with anything less than perfection and leaving us feeling chronically stressed, anxious, and inadequate.

So, if you didn't know, one definition of perfectionism is a mindset characterized by an unrelenting pursuit of flawlessness and a deep fear of failure or disapproval. It's basically a self-belief that anything less than perfect is unacceptable and that our worth as individuals is reliant upon our achievements and external validation.

But ya know what? Its an illusion. It's an unattainable standard that no one can ever truly reach. And yet, so many of us fall into the trap of chasing after it, believing that if only we could be perfect, then we would finally be happy and fulfilled. But the reality is that perfectionism is a never-ending cycle of striving and never arriving—a treadmill of self-doubt and dissatisfaction that only leads to burnout and despair.

So how do we jump off the treadmill? Here are a few strategies to consider:

Give yourself some bloody grace! (I have said this to a number of clients AND friends this week) Instead of beating yourself up for not being perfect, practice self-compassion and be kind to yourself. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend, colleague or co-worker. Remember that it's okay to make mistakes and that failure is an inevitable part of the learning process.

Be realistic! Rather than aiming for perfection, set realistic and achievable goals that allow for progress and growth. It's okay to aim high, but start by breaking down larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks, and don't forget to celebrate your success along the way.

Challenge that perfectionist thinking when it crops up. STOP and reset. Make a point of noticing when perfectionistic thoughts arise and challenge them with more balanced and realistic perspectives. Ask yourself, "Is this really attainable? What would happen if I allowed myself to be imperfect?"

Focus on the process, not the outcome. Instead of obsessing over the end result, focus on enjoying the journey and what that means for your growth and learning. Embrace the inherent messiness of life and allow yourself to take risks and make mistakes along the way.